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BREAKING NEWS
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WA****NGTON -- Democrat
Presidential aspirant Sen. Hillary
Clinton angrily lashed out at
President Bush today, claiming
he stole her idea to ease the
pain of skyrocketing gasoline
prices by signing new legisaltion
giving U.S. motorists "Free Vaseline
With Your Gasoline."
"Butt out, George," she remarked
during a campaign stop in Kentucky.
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The new bill also will cover
the purchase of diesel fuel and
kerosene.
The "Free Vaseline With Your
Gasoline" legislation has been
hailed by most Americans although
members of the Anus Surgeon
Society (ASS) of America anticipate
a drastic reduction in business.
Eligible for Vaseline at every fill-up
are those earning less than $200,000
a year and do not drive a Lamborghini
Murcielago LP 640 Roadster or
a Hummer..
All others, including the fat-cat
politicians of both parties, will be
given a free tube of Crazy Glue. An
ASS spokesman said it should perk
up the business that otherwise
would be lost...
More information is available at
http://www.edconrad.com
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