=== SOLD!!!=====
"Joe Biffel" <oberleutnant@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> wrote in message
news:xYb6i.228061$6m4.86177@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
>I am selling a home built Time Machine. Comes with all specifications,
> instruction manual (in pdf format), spare parts and a cup holder. I've
> only
> used it 2 times, and I have no desire to alter the history nor the
future,
> thus I want to get rid of this curse I had built in my mom's basement 1
> year
> ago. The project begun 4 years ago with my friend Raymond Basoon who
used
> to
> work at Area 51 and is currently employed at JPL. We both have degrees
in
> engineering, interior design, strong typing skills and janitorial
> expertise.
> When employed at Area 51, Raymond was an assistant to the surgeon
general
> during 7 Alien autopsies, and also reverse engineered 2 types of crashed
> extra terrestrial, cigar shaped aircraft. I had worked at JPL as well,
> having been assigned to a crucial position in the mail room. After hours
> of
> collaboration, Raymond and I concocted plans to built a Time Machine.
One
> unit only. It is built of Titanium, stainless steel and rubber. The
> complex
> mathematics needed to calculate various time distortion cycles and
> dimension
> warps are handled by an onboard computer mounted at eye level. The time
> and
> date is punched in using a standart telephone numeric pad. Power is
> generated from 30 electric motors that have been removed from 10 spd
> blenders. The traveler is enclosed in a plastic/tin foil cockpit to
> prevent
> various dimension radiation waves and time travel fallout dust. The
frame
> holds a comfortable polyester chair. The unit also includes a CD Player
> and
> 3 speakers. This unit is INCREDIBLE! If you want to wintess your own
> birth,
> the murder of your uncle or the opening of Expo '86, this delicate, high
> tech instrument will blow your mind. I'm not sure this type of
technology
> is
> legal therefore before you buy you have to sign a waver of confidence
and
> secrecy. I just want to be safe from the CIA and the NSA. If you like to
> travel,
> the ultimate trip is waiting for you in my garage. SERIOUS replies only
> please. If you are interested in the purchase please send a statement of
> good health and eye sight signed by your doctor. WE DO NOT DELIVER.
> Knowledge of Martial Arts helpfull when travelling. Please reply if you
> are
> interested in the purchase.
>
> Price $59, 000
> 3 day warranty.
> Free bumper sticker
> 2 hour tutorial
> I'll also throw in my helmet.
>
> Reply to Joe Biffel.
>
> Disclaimer..... Joe Biffel or Raymond Basoon are not in any way
> responsible
> for any harm that might come to the travellers way while in the past or
> the
> future. The potential traveller must remember that during the passing
> times,
> society and culture has changed in many ways and this might impact the
> perception of yourself by others. We suggest that you research the time
> era
> you're about to travel to thoroughly and dress appropriately to avoid
> suspision and trouble.
>
>
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