I Rule This Newsgroup With A Very Gothic Iron Fist!

You are all weak!  Worthless and weak!  Which is why only I am fit to rule!

I, Jack am the most pretentious of them all I therefore claim this
pathetic
newsgroup in the name of Jack.  Bow down before me!  Wor****p me!  Bring me
black, gothic things, free drinks, many cloves and ***y death chicks!

I now rule this newsgroup with an Iron Fist!  Tremble before the
awsomeness
of my Very Gothic Iron Fist!

You there!  In the corner!  You're not Obeying me.  Obey the Fist!

--
-Jack-
"Death.  It's not just for breakfast anymore."