On Sat, Apr 05, 2008 at 01:56:55PM +0000, Modemac wrote:
> FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
> Contact: The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. 1-216-320-9528
> Fax: (216) 320-9528
> stang@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
>
> CLEVELAND, Ohio, April 5, 2008: The Church of the SubGenius has
> announced that the end of the world will take place on Saturday, July
> 5, 2008. In preparation for the fulfillment of this doomsday prophecy,
> the Church is requesting that all of its members participate in a
> bizarre religious ceremony taking place in upstate New York, during
> the final weekend before the arrival of the apocalypse.
>
> Since its inception in 1953, Church founder J.R. "Bob" Dobbs has
> predicted that a fleet of flying saucers will arrive at the beginning
> of July to destroy the worldwide Conspiracy against the Church of the
> SubGenius, while all ordained SubGenius ministers will be rescued by
> escape vessels piloted by the Alien *** Goddesses, also known as the
> Xists.
>
> The Church is inviting all of its members worldwide to gather together
> for the final hours in Sherman, New York from Wednesday, July 2 to
> Sunday, July 6, at a clothing-optional outdoor campground called
> Brushwood Folklore Center. The first gathering at this compound took
> place in 1996, and the event has increased in size and participants
> each following year. 1998 was designated the first true "X-Day," and
> each successive year has added one to the total. This year's
> celebration in 2008 is X-Day 11, or X-Day XI.
>
> The Church has been engaged in a massive recruitment campaign to
> increase the numbers of its member****p before the arrival of the
> Xists. According to Church records, the organization currently has
> approximately 100,000 members worldwide. SubGenius recruitment has
> been especially dedicated among the ranks of people who refuse to
> conform to the norms of society, including disbelievers, blasphemers,
> pranksters, rebels, hackers, ****ographers, geeks, and outcasts.
>
> The Church is seeking underground bands, indie rockers, performance
> artists, and performers and producers from the adult entertainment
> industry, because ***ual freedom has been an im****tant part of Church
> doctrine from the start. X-Day will be a celebration of free
> expression, performance art, rock and roll, ****ography, and adult
> entertainment; and certain parts of the event will be restricted to
> adults only. Only ordained ministers of the Church of the SubGenius
> are allowed at the event, but the Church is accepting member****ps at
> its standard rate of $30 up until the final hours of July 4.
I've been putting off officially joining for a while now, mainly because I
can't expense the fee yet. I'd accept it if my member****p was comped, but
none of my employers know what the Church is (which is probably why I have
a closet full of mouse-pads, back-scratchers, cor****ate-logo frisbees,
unused hockey tickets, and a croquet set). Since member****p seems to be
the only way onto the saucers, I'd better start thinking about getting a
chequebook.
Regards,
Steve
--
The diversity stole my bicycle.
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