Re: First posting...

Aqua wrote:

> philip_bordley@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
 wrote:
> 
>> So why the hell am I so scared of hurting the two women I care about
>> most in this world?  Why is this situation terrifying me more than the
>> first time I asked my wife out?  I’m forty years old...I shouldn’t
>> feel like a mixed up kid should I?
> 
> 
> There doesn't need to be a "why".  It's okay to be scared, and it might 
> be useful to talk to both of them about it.  At least it might give them

> insight if you sometimes act a bit oddly about the whole situation.
> 
> And you're full of exciting new emotions - here we sometimes talk about 
> NRE, which means "new relation****p energy" but could also mean "new 
> relation****p emotions", and there is absolutely no age limit on those. 
> Sorry :-).
> 
> My other suggestion (which of course is worth what you paid for it) is 
> that if you haven't already, make sure K and your wife have a one-on-one

> chat about how they each understand the situation.  It may help K 
> understand that she won't be "sneaking around" on your wife.

What she said.

I will say this: You may be in a better position to carefully explore 
the possibilities here than many people who leap into polyamory without 
previously established friend****ps. The three of you already know and 
trust and respect each other, and in my experience, that's a good place 
for *any* relation****p to start from.

Take it slowly, and don't let the ****ny new feelings for K distract you 
you from expressing your love for your wife. Despite her level-headed 
approach to this new development, she may feel nervous at times, too; so 
may K. Keep talking, all three of you. And if K wants to learn more 
about how this kind of relation****p can work when it's *not* part of a 
religion or "just to get more ***," feel free to refer her here, or to 
the very useful resource pages at http://www.polyamory.org/.

Best wishes,

-- 
Pat Kight
kightp@[EMAIL PROTECTED]