OK, I might get hollered at for cross-posting from the Oracularities,
but this is just too, too good not to share.
As the Zen Master said to the hot dog vendor, "Make me one with
everything."
..s
=========================================
The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply.
Your question was:
> Oracle Most Triumphant and Glorious:
>
> I'm tired of drudgery, sick to death of small paychecks and large
> bills, and just bored with the conventional ordinariness of my life.
> My question is this:
>
> Oracle, How can I become a Hero?
And in response, thus spake the Oracle:
} -- How to Make a Hero --
}
} Ingredients
}
} * 1/2 cup bravery
} * 1/4 cup Italian Attitude (may substitutes w/
} any other attitude to taste)
} * 3 cups shredded ideals
} * 1 loafer or freeloader, cut in half lengthwise
} * 8 ounces thinly veiled contempt for the law
} * 8 kilos of muscle
} * 2 large cojones
} * 6 slices Scientific Know-How (may substitute w/
} animal cunning, or trickster antics)
} * 1 Secret Ability and/or Dark Secret
}
} Directions
}
} 1. Mix everything but the loafer together in a
} crucible of pain for all humanities woes
} 2. Toss aside any misconceptions of being loved
} by all, or honored by society
} 3. Cram everything into the freeloader and tell
} him, "It's up to you to Save The World!"
}
} You the Oracle a foot long frankfurter.
|
